Light a candle. Pull the required sigils. Now, raise your own arms above your head and gradually, gently, exhale your soul. A person won’t need it here. This is Audioccult, and it’s time to get reduced. Illustration: SHALTMIRA
As a teen, I’ve been around “the block” a few times. I’m what you’d hashtag as an #experiencedgoth. I know all the teen tips, and I know what your own black-clad teen wants: a new family. But they also probably want the best in modern underground music, which you can learn about in this guide written by somebody with more than eight black shirts. I’m cumming on a bat and sending it into the heavens to guide you. A gift…
NOTE: Batcave Army-types, before you decide to unleash your dark rage about the subjectivity of the selections here and lack of ‘80s content, please view the previous edition’s caveat. Here’s the pass: Virgin Prunes Rozz Williams that one “No Tears” song and the like.
In the very first edition, I covered the genres that would be the most difficult to get that will teen into, from Scott Walker to harsh, noisy metal, commercial and powernoise. Now I want to discuss some of the bands who are closer to ‘real goth’, if you want to put it the way a goth would. Music rooted in dark synth and post-punk, fundamentally. There are plenty of fantastic variants of such stuff floating around in sub-mainstream blogworld—possibly your know-it-all teen knows about Trust, Chelsea Wolfe, and Zola Christ. But I’d be willing to bet that piece of shit hasn’t heard of
-Bestial Mouths‘ Bestial Mouths. I’d suggest listening to Bestial Mouths to just regarding anyone, really. If you’re at all interested in generally underground subculture, you’ll find something to love here. Their latest remix album is pretty fantastic as well, bouncing around from AAIMON’s driving commercial metal to Nightchilde’s haunting dark techno. Shove this in your teen’s encounter and laugh because that fucker won’t even know what’s arriving. My teen told me today that they don’t think Fad Gadget is “so good”. I hate my teen and the choices I made being an adult.
Haus Arafna’s anything really, it all kinds of noises the same. Sorry, true. That’s not to say it doesn’t all audio pretty damn good ; the harshness of the instrumentals also bridge the gap between noise and minimal wave nicely, opening two a lot more gateways for your teen to explore. If your teen is a German teen, they are going to ‘get’ this way more than other teens might. In this case, burn the album yourself and intersperse the tracks with different quality versions of “All Star” by nineties sensations Smashmouth. This will ensure your German Goth Teenager doesn’t go Full Grufti on your own ass. Some shit is just too dour for this mortal coil.
Troller’s Troller . A passion for 4AD’s early catalog is fairly fucking essential within a young person’s life, but that will modern teen is going to be fairly banging unimpressed when you try to sneak your own awful attempts at record rips onto their iPad, iPhone or even other Apple device. Troller’s debut is about as gauzy, weird plus beautifully sad as anything released by Ivo & Co., yet comes with the added benefit of being able to view the band live without feeling like you’re watching Grandad’s Pub Rock Experience.
Shadowlust’s Trust In Pain. Another bridge, this time to the blacker shades of techno. Your child is going to be facing a lot of pressure through his, her or their peer group towards some pretty abysmal techno offshoots (which we’ll be talking about more next week) so you need to put a stop to that right away. Issue album doesn’t make your teen destroy themselves, it’ll at least guide all of them toward something with more merit, visually, specifically from your perspective. Fucking wiped out teen or mentally fulfilled teen, either way holla at the weekend nearing. Hashtag #TGIFridaysGoth.
Various other amazing and super-cool bands to wave over your teen and make all of them feel horrible and stupid: Animal Bodies, Tropic of Cancer, HTRK, maybe you want to get traditional and show them the Vanishing, really you know what, if you just do a puppet show before they go to mattress each night where you make a Diamanda Galas record and a Nico record hug, I’m sure that will be fine.
NEXT WEEK: Industrial dance: know the dangers. Also, I grew up listening to Biggie and Bauhaus and so should your teen. ~